Daughter of a Sailor Guest Blog

Daughter of a Sailor and her favorite Deck Hand bring you this blog post.

Upon finishing two weeks on the boat with my dad, one thing is easily apparent; this was an amazing, once in a lifetime experience. There are not many people who have such an invitation: "Come join me on my year long sailing cruise... Where would you like to meet?... What kind of sailing would you like to do?"

For many years I have sailed with my dad. From a goofy middle school kid in Lake Michigan to a working adult using my vacation time in Florida, I have always enjoyed the opportunity to be on the boat, soak in some time with my dad, and embark on the ultimate relaxation: boat life.

As one who has sailed with a Son of a Sailor over the years, I have proudly embraced myself as a Daughter of a Sailor. When people ask me about my dad, what he does, or what this trip he is doing is about, I proudly tell them about his past experiences and current adventures. With great excitement, Phil and I committed to a two week excursion with my dad at the beginnings of his year-long sailing journey. When Phil would ask me what our trip was going to be like I did my best to explain. I knew we'd have no problem making our journey from Norfolk, Virginia to Norwalk, Connecticut because in my years sailing with my dad I know that he is not just a guy with a boat, he is a true sailor.

So what does it take to be a true sailor? To embark on year-long sailing adventure? Is it a love of Jimmy Buffett? A desire to embrace the boat life? A big check book? Well, after our two weeks with our faithful Captain, Phil and I have distilled this question down to a few key points, and this distilling doesn't lead its way into a fine, fresh rum, but rather, a competent, responsible and trustworthy sailor with a dash of fun that keeps you wanting more.

1. Respect: While sailing on a 34-foot boat there is much to respect. The ocean waves that call you to cruise can make you sick in a sight, the currents that create the speed you need during the day can lead to a worrisome anchor at night, and the tight quarters in the boat can make you wonder if those you call close are those you can tolerate aboard a 34-foot vessel for two weeks. Fortunately, while sailing with my dad, respect is one thing I see him embody throughout each day. From checking in with his wife and mother about our take-off and arrival to assure they are confident in our safety, to checking our courses for obstacles such as jetties, shipping traffic, and water depth to assure our safety and comfort. Not only did he carry respect for major items like communication with those he loved and reverie for the water that carries us to our next destination, he also showed respect for minor things, like admitting to us on our last day that he lent us his pillow so we would be comfortable sleeping at night.
   

Dad charting our course. (Don't mind his hair, it's windy out there!)

2. Skill: There are not many people who will tell you they carry three GPS units just in case, nor many boaters that actually use their charts regularly to plot their course and destination. There are not many boaters who can individually and simultaneously keep one hand on the mainsail while letting out the jib with the other, all while monitoring the wind and knowing the minute details of the angels of the waves. There are not many people cautious enough to know in the moment they are cruising with the spinnaker out that it's time to take it down, because, although its fun, it safer to take it down now before the wind picks up speed. There are not many people who will take you around an island outside of Manhattan and say, "this is where my cutter was docked when I was in the Coast Guard Academy." Such skill and experience does not result from reading pages in a book, but from years of interest, passion, and study.

Dad and Phil putting the sail cover back on after a nice-days sail.

3. Passion: It's clear that my dad is passionate about sailing, but another type of passion that makes him a true sailor is a passion for life. His boat is stowed with golf clubs, a guitar, a cribbage board, books, and a Bose speaker; all hobbies he enjoys that make his time alone at sea and anchor enjoyable. One morning when I snoozed I heard him swim and take a dingy ride all before I truly opened my eyes for the day. When the time comes that we are not moving, a true sailor like my dad tinkers with his engine and puts a mask on to check his propeller, demonstrating the combination of the passion and interest one needs not only for his boat, but also for life and the present moment that is necessary to embrace an extended adventure.

   

   Passion includes making time for fun, such as playing cribbage during a mellow cruise on a hot day.

   
   

   

   We decided to capitalize on our time in New Jersey by giving each other nicknames from the TV show "Jersey Shore." We made our gaming extra competitive by tracking our wins and point differentials. 

   
   

4. Attitude: A true sailor knows that any length of time at sea will lead to some sort of troubles. While I have learned from the river rafting community that "proper planning prevents poor performance," a true adventurer of any sport knows that no amount of preparation can prevent an accident. A true sailor takes many precautions, like putting on a life jacket even when it seems unnecessary.  A true sailor also expects the unexpected. As you likely read in a previous blog, my dads propeller fell off the boat. During the entire propeller experience my dad's attitude helped all to stay calm and confident. Although my dad took the precaution prior to his trip to install a new propeller, he also took the precaution to save the old propeller. And his attitude was this, "on a trip like this, you have to expect that things are going to happen." Such an attitude got my dad through a potentially anxiety-provoking experience, and allowed him to connect with the fellow boaters and divers who rescued the propeller from the muck. And as a further testament to his attitude, I have found my dad saying at almost every anchorage and marina, "this place is beautiful..." or, "you don't see any places more beautiful than this..." Truly, a Son of a Sailor in his element.

   

   This picture was taken on our final day. Our attitude, "lets keep going, we don't want to go home!"

Finishing our two-week adventure in Norwalk, Connecticut led Phil, my dad, and myself to connect with some loved family and friends. It also led us to a marina outside one of the wealthiest counties in the US: Fairfield Country. I said to Phil, "I think my dad's boat is the smallest boat in this marina." I was reminded that it not was the size or style of one's boat that makes him capable of success at sea, but rather his respect, skill, passion and attitude. In conversation with one of Phil's friends in Norwalk (who boasts an extensive resume of sailboat racing) we discussed the differences between true sailors and a person who simply owns a boat. We heard stories of local sailors getting their boats stuck under the bridges of  the East River, and people being swept away by currents near Cape Hatteras. A person can't just own a boat and assume safety at sea. It takes a true history of passion, interest, experience, respect, and positivity that allows one to truly return home safely.

In concluding my trip with my oldest cousin, Christine, who was especially close with my grandfather, I found myself feeling emotional. Not only for having to go home after an amazing two weeks, but also for the fact that we spent the afternoon with her adorable four-year old, and her adorable baby bump representing a new family member along the way. My cousin brought her four-year old daughter, Arianna, down to the water where my dad taught her a "captain's salute."  In the legacy of our grandfather, we can all salute him for teaching my dad what it means to be a true "Son of Sailor", and not just some guy with a boat, so that my dad can live his passion and adventure, but also to make it home safely to all those that love him, and for those that will be inspired by him (and my grandpa) as our families legacy continues.

Sun of a Sailor in his element. Cheers to Green Ayes and to Grandpa!

To view all the photos I took on our trip, including some awesome NYC photos, you can view an album I created by clicking the link below

Carolyn's Norfolk to Norwalk Photos